So I finally finished the book on Mother & Son: The Respect Effect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs last night. The last post about this was back in June so I apologize for the late wrap up of this.
Respecting a boy is all about his glory, honor and reverence. We are to love a boy by respecting and enjoying him. Our boys need both love and respect. We have to teach them that our response is our responsibility. We need to go beyond love to meet their need for respect. The best approach given by Emerson when there is a situation is to respond in a respectful manner with consequences that your son will feel. Giving a firm and respectful discipline will allow your son to obey. This gives a positive goal for your son to get back on track in a Christ-like manner. As a wife and a mother, we are to show respect in the family and that means everyone. Not just your sons, but daughters if you have them and absolutely your spouse and of course towards God and Jesus. As moms, we are to have a respectful attitude even in times when your loved ones refuse to be loving, respectful and obedient in return.
Forgiveness is seeking and giving. Seeking forgiveness is in trusting and following Jesus. You should seek this when you know you are being disrespectful yourself. You can say this to the person affected something like this, “I am sorry. Will you forgive me for being disrespectful?” and seek it out with Christ too. Biblically, God wants us to be loving and honoring. Emerson reminds us that Jesus honors us so we have to honor him with our sons. Giving forgiveness allows you as a mom to gain a forgiving spirit while remaining diligent to what’s best for your son. We are to remember and keep it in our hearts and mind that we4 aren’t to let Satan beat us in anger. God has a biblical rule of that we don’t let the sun go down on our anger. We are to serve wholeheartly as if we serve the Lord, not people. We belong to God always. We are to see Christ just like as we see our sons. It’s important that we approach them with respect and dignity. Our sons are to be a man of honor.
To have a stronger relationship with your sons, we need to say these following things to our sons more often (don’t overdo it though!):
I respect you
I appreciate you
I am proud of you
When it comes to disciplining our sons, we need to approach them with this, “You are a man of honor, so help me understand why you did xyz”. The respect given allows boys and men to be more acting and being more loving.