I made the choice to move out of my parents house when I was almost 21. I was already engaged to my husband at the time. We were already sexually active. My parents at the time were driving me crazy and I felt like I didn’t have enough independence at home. Also I wanted the opportunity to be able to see what it was like to live with my husband to be for a year before we officially tied the knot. This was my next season in my life.
I remember the days that I was boxing up stuff in my old room. I had mixed emotions. I had already moved once before. My parents had bought a new house when I was 13. I had moved from my childhood home to that new one where I had literally spent my teenage years in. It was sad to leave my teenage bedroom and actually *I* did have the master bedroom of that house. I had my ensuite bathroom with a shower (which I did share with everyone else). I shared my closets with my mom. She had one and I had the other. The deal was when I was 13 if I wanted that room, I had to share that other closet with her and share the shower with everyone else (but the rest of the bathroom was mine) and keep the bedroom clean as much as possible. I was able to keep that deal until I moved out (then my little brother, Alex took over that room for a quite a few years). My parents have since moved again (7 years later). They moved after my older brother Dylan married Sarah and before I got pregnant with Jackson.
My mom was sad to see me leave as I was her only daughter. I remember a couple months later that she had missed me at home (even though honestly, I wasn’t home that much the last few months leading up to the move with school and spending free time with my husband to be). But I knew it was the right decision. The move to live with my husband in an apartment. I was ready for more independence. I knew that I wouldn’t be that person that would crawl back to my parents. I knew that I would be okay with my husband. That we would work through anything even if it took time and patience.
I loved being able to spend any time that I was in the apartment with my husband when I wasn’t working. We definitely learned more about each other in the apartment. My mom did teach me a few things before moving but I didn’t always put that to use. Honestly, I didn’t clean as much I should have been. I didn’t cook really. But we still learned more about each other and (and still do to this day). We had that apartment for just little over 3 years. and then we got our first house (and we are still in this house now almost 8 years later). And we’ve improved greatly as a couple and individually since we got our first house and we have three boys. Certainly with being a stay home mom and wife, I certainly do a lot more upkeep of the house with cleaning and doing other chores like laundry and the like.
We don’t like to ask for help but we do with each other. Outside of each other, we feel that it’s important that we try things ourselves before we ask for family help or friends. Certainly we are blessed with my parents who have pitched in with certain things and we are grateful for them and same with my in-laws too. I’m now certainly comfortable with my role at home now. I am thankful for all who dearly embrace my role to me as it really boosts my esteem. My home and my children is my ministry. This is how I serve the Lord and my family. I feel beauty and warmth in this home with my husband and my kids.