I am resuming my thoughts as I read through Sheila Wray Gregoire’s book Nine Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage. Chapter 3 is about My Husband Was Not Put On This Earth to Make Me Happy.
Sheila shares what is the purpose of marriage which is to be more like Christ individually and as a couple.
“Your marriage is not about happiness; your marriage is about both of you looking more and more like Jesus every day as you both do what is right. You’ll demonstrate mercy, forgiving each other as Christ forgave you. You’ll shower blessings on each other. But you’ll also stand up for justice, believing that looking like Jesus means that you will stand for truth. When you do that, it’s quite likely that you’ll find happiness too” (Gregoire, 59).
That is exactly what my husband and I are striving to do. God really woke us up two years ago, 7 years into our marriage. Showing us in truth that we were in a deep mess and we needed to rely on Him to transform us individually, as a couple, and the marriage itself. It’s ongoing process. I ask God everyday to keep making me better. Because we’re all sinners. We definitely have transformed and will continue to keep transforming. As long God is the center of our marriage and our lives, we will keep growing into Jesus. We’re definitely happier as a couple absolutely now.
Contentment is our own responsibility. Sheila shares that we find happiness on our own, not through our spouses. Falling in love with God and being at peace with Him. God is always the first priority then your spouse is 2nd, then your kids is 3rd, and so on. God makes us know that we are worthy. That we are more than a spouse and a parent. So we need to add things to our lives that give us joy as an individual.
Like for me, photography is my joy. Pictures tell a story. Gives me the chance to enjoy life through it and also enjoy the natural beauty outside as God’s creation. I also like to blog because it makes me know myself more, know where I am in this life as I grow in Christ and to share it with the world. I also like getting my nails done and massages. I also like to spend time with friends even though I don’t have as many as I did in my younger days .
My husband is also finding contentment with himself through riding a motorcycle. He is also happy when he does also get the chance to spend time with his friends. He does donate blood when he can. I’m sure my husband will find more ways to be content with himself. So that he can continue to grow into being a godly husband and man.