Both spouses in marriage should see one another as equals. Each one should do their part in the marriage, in the home, and etc. I believe it creates more love, happiness, and etc. when couples help each other out with everything.
My husband is the breadwinner in our family. He assembles cars at Toyota, and so that is his income for our family. I am the one that stays home as a wife and as mom. I worked outside of the home (we both did!) until our oldest, Logan was born in 2009. Then I was on maternity leave and then got pregnant with Austin, but I had already made my choice during Logan’s pregnancy that I would be done with the business world and invest myself in motherhood and taking care of the house. However, I didn’t really take care of the house well, for a long time. I would do the basis of laundry and food and dishes. I didn’t really take care of anything else. I had my focus on Logan, and then Austin and eventually had Jackson. But I did step up more after Austin, when my husband was back to work after his 4 month paternal leave. And I do a lot more now, since having had Jackson in 2013. My husband would be left to do everything else and would be burned out a lot and stressful. But now, I really see it and it is MY job to do most housework and care for the kids at the same time. My husband still is amazing though. He will still help out when he is home, but it’s not as a long of a list he used to chore to, like 5 + years ago, but he does still do a lot. He is one of the few rare guys that do care, and will do care for the kids and housework when I need him (or when he chooses to do). It is a lot more better now and less stressful and we are more loving with each other. So I’m very thankful for that!
IT is important to serve each other with LOVE and IN LOVE. While my husband may be the leader of our family, I can still lead him and support him. And I really do love and appreciate that he can do laundry, vacuum, do dishes, and etc, that would normally just be more on a womanly basis. He can even sew too! (so crazy!). So I love that there isn’t really stereotyping here. I know I still don’t do a whole lot of manly jobs. But Once in a blue moon, I will cut the grass in the summer.
It is still gracious to ask if you could do anything to help your spouse out with anything. Physically, emotionally, sexually, financially, and etc. IT means more than you think! We ask each other that regularly now.
While doing more chores shouldn’t have to be a reason to have sex/be sexy later, but it does attract the hormones. I know my husband told me a long time ago, when we were living together in our first place, our apartment, that he found me sexy doing dishes (and that was a rarity then too). On tough days, I have to keep reminding myself that doing my part in the home (and with the kids) is good for the soul and is also glorifying to God (and to our marriage too!).